How does “The Tao of Badass” recommend men deal with boredom in a long-term relationship?

October 28, 2024

How does “The Tao of Badass” recommend men deal with boredom in a long-term relationship?

In The Tao of Badass, Joshua Pellicer recommends several strategies for dealing with boredom in a long-term relationship. The book emphasizes that boredom is a natural occurrence in long-term relationships, but how it is managed can make or break the relationship. Here are some of the key strategies Pellicer suggests for men to overcome boredom and keep the relationship exciting:

1. Inject Playfulness and Spontaneity

  • What it involves: Pellicer encourages introducing playfulness and spontaneity to prevent the relationship from becoming stale. This can include surprising your partner with fun activities, spontaneous dates, or playful teasing.
  • Why it helps: Spontaneity helps break the monotony of daily routines and reignites excitement, keeping both partners emotionally and physically engaged. Playful energy fosters a dynamic connection that can rekindle attraction and joy.

2. Revisit the “Chase”

  • What it involves: The book emphasizes reintroducing elements of the early dating phase where the excitement and thrill of the chase were present. By showing interest but also maintaining a sense of independence, you can create a push-pull dynamic that keeps the relationship exciting.
  • Why it helps: Recreating the excitement of the initial stages of the relationship can help reignite passion and prevent boredom. It encourages both partners to continue “winning each other over,” maintaining a sense of challenge and growth.

3. Continue Growing and Evolving Personally

  • What it involves: Pellicer advises men to keep developing themselves—whether it’s learning new skills, pursuing hobbies, or setting personal goals. This continual self-growth not only keeps the individual engaged but also brings fresh energy into the relationship.
  • Why it helps: Personal growth creates new topics of conversation and experiences to share, which can revitalize the relationship. It also shows your partner that you’re committed to being the best version of yourself, making the relationship more fulfilling.

4. Create New Experiences Together

  • What it involves: Pellicer suggests that couples should actively seek out new experiences and adventures together. This could be traveling, learning a new hobby together, or even trying new activities that both partners find exciting.
  • Why it helps: Sharing new experiences helps strengthen the bond between partners and keeps the relationship dynamic. By breaking out of the routine and engaging in fresh activities, both partners feel more connected and stimulated.

5. Communicate Openly About Needs and Desires

  • What it involves: Pellicer stresses the importance of communicating openly about any feelings of boredom or dissatisfaction. Rather than letting these feelings fester, partners should talk about their desires and work together to inject excitement into the relationship.
  • Why it helps: Open communication prevents misunderstandings and allows both partners to address any issues early on. By discussing what excites and engages them, partners can work on keeping the relationship fun and rewarding.

6. Maintain Mystery and Independence

  • What it involves: Maintaining a sense of mystery and independence, even in a long-term relationship, can prevent boredom. This means not becoming too predictable or overly dependent on the relationship for fulfillment.
  • Why it helps: By preserving some personal space and mystery, both partners continue to see each other as interesting and unique individuals, keeping the relationship fresh and preventing stagnation.

7. Keep Flirting and Being Affectionate

  • What it involves: Pellicer advises that men should never stop flirting with their partner, even after years of being together. Light teasing, compliments, and affectionate gestures help maintain the romantic and playful aspects of the relationship.
  • Why it helps: Flirting and affection keep the emotional and physical connection strong, which combats the sense of complacency that can set in over time. It also reinforces feelings of attraction and desire between partners.

Conclusion

In The Tao of Badass, Pellicer emphasizes that dealing with boredom in a long-term relationship involves maintaining playfulness, seeking new experiences, personal growth, and keeping the dynamic fresh through communication and spontaneity. By continuing to invest in the relationship and ensuring it evolves, couples can prevent boredom and keep the relationship exciting and fulfilling.