How does “The Tao of Badass” address the concept of pre-selection?
“The Tao of Badass” by Joshua Pellicer addresses the concept of pre-selection as a powerful psychological and social dynamic that can significantly influence attraction in the dating world. Pre-selection refers to the idea that individuals are perceived as more attractive when they are seen as being desired or approved by others, particularly by members of the opposite sex. Here’s a detailed explanation of how “The Tao of Badass” explores and advises on utilizing pre-selection:
1. Understanding Pre-Selection
- Social Proof: The program explains pre-selection as a form of social proof, where the validation or interest shown by others enhances one’s perceived value. In a dating context, when women see that a man is already desired by other women, they are more likely to find him attractive because he is perceived as having qualities that are desirable.
- Evolutionary Basis: “The Tao of Badass” suggests that pre-selection has evolutionary roots, where being chosen by others serves as a signal of high value or good genetics. This instinctual response to pre-selection is why it often has a strong impact on attraction.
2. How Pre-Selection Works in Social Settings
- Subtle Signals: The program emphasizes that pre-selection does not require overt displays or bragging about previous relationships. Instead, subtle signals that a man is comfortable around women, that women enjoy his company, or that he is socially validated by women are enough to trigger the pre-selection effect.
- Interactions with Other Women: One of the key strategies mentioned is interacting positively with other women in a social setting. When a man is seen interacting comfortably, confidently, and respectfully with women, it signals to others that he is socially adept and likely a desirable partner.
3. Leveraging Pre-Selection
- Building Social Circles: “The Tao of Badass” advises building a social circle that includes both men and women. When a man is seen in the company of other women, especially if those women appear to enjoy his company, it naturally boosts his attractiveness through pre-selection.
- Positive Social Presence: The program suggests that being socially active and present in mixed-gender environments—such as parties, gatherings, or social events—helps to naturally display pre-selection. The key is to engage in these settings in a way that highlights social confidence and ease around women.
4. Avoiding the Pitfalls of Pre-Selection
- Genuine Interactions: The guide warns against trying to artificially create pre-selection through manipulative tactics, such as pretending to be in high demand or flaunting interactions with other women in a disingenuous way. This can come off as arrogant or desperate, which can have the opposite effect.
- Respect for Boundaries: It’s important to practice pre-selection in a way that respects the boundaries of others. For example, using genuine friendships or positive interactions with women to display pre-selection is effective, whereas using others as mere props can be damaging to relationships and reputation.
5. Combining Pre-Selection with Other Techniques
- Complimenting Other Attraction Triggers: “The Tao of Badass” emphasizes that pre-selection is most effective when combined with other attraction-building techniques, such as confidence, humor, and good communication skills. Pre-selection enhances these qualities by adding a layer of social proof.
- Building Authentic Relationships: The program suggests that instead of focusing solely on pre-selection, men should focus on building authentic relationships and connections with others. When these connections are genuine, pre-selection naturally becomes a byproduct of a well-rounded social life.
6. The Psychological Impact of Pre-Selection
- Creating Intrigue: Pre-selection can create a sense of intrigue and curiosity. When a man is seen as someone who is already appreciated and liked by other women, it piques the interest of others who may wonder what makes him so desirable.
- Reducing Neediness: Men who are pre-selected often appear less needy because they are already validated socially. This can make them more attractive because they do not seem desperate for attention or approval, which is often a turn-off in dating scenarios.
7. Practical Application of Pre-Selection
- Social Media Presence: The program advises that even in the digital realm, pre-selection can play a role. A man who is seen interacting positively with women on social media, or who is featured in photos with women who appear to enjoy his company, can benefit from pre-selection.
- Handling Group Dynamics: In group settings, it’s recommended that men position themselves in a way that naturally demonstrates pre-selection. This might include being friendly and engaging with everyone in the group, allowing others to see that they are socially validated and appreciated by women.
8. Ethical Considerations
- Authenticity Over Manipulation: While pre-selection can be a powerful tool, “The Tao of Badass” stresses the importance of using it ethically. The focus should be on being authentic and genuine in interactions, rather than trying to manipulate situations to falsely create the appearance of pre-selection.
Conclusion
In “The Tao of Badass,” pre-selection is presented as a key concept in enhancing one’s attractiveness by leveraging the psychological effects of social proof. By being socially adept, interacting positively with women, and maintaining genuine relationships, men can naturally benefit from the pre-selection effect. However, the program also emphasizes the importance of authenticity and ethical behavior in using this concept, ensuring that it complements other attraction-building strategies and contributes to healthy, respectful interactions in the dating world.