What are the “Texting Do’s and Don’ts” specifically for the early stages of dating in “Magnetic Messaging by Bobby Rio and Rob Judge”?
In “Magnetic Messaging” by Bobby Rio and Rob Judge, the authors provide clear Texting Do’s and Don’ts specifically tailored for the early stages of dating. These guidelines are designed to help build attraction, keep the conversation engaging, and avoid common pitfalls that can harm your chances of success. The early stages are crucial for establishing rapport and creating intrigue, and texting plays a key role in making or breaking the connection.
Here’s a detailed breakdown of the Texting Do’s and Don’ts from Magnetic Messaging for the early stages of dating:
Texting Do’s
1. Do Keep It Light and Fun
One of the key rules in Magnetic Messaging is to ensure that your texts remain playful and enjoyable. Early-stage texting should be used to build positive emotions and excitement, not for serious or deep conversations.
- Why It’s Important: Fun and playful texts help keep the interaction light, preventing things from getting too heavy or awkward too soon. It also helps build rapport by showing your sense of humor and confidence.
- Example: “I just saw a dog wearing sunglasses and immediately thought of you. How’s your day going, superstar?”
2. Do Use Humor and Playful Teasing
Humor is a powerful tool in building attraction, and playful teasing can create a flirty dynamic. Teasing shows confidence and allows you to be fun without being needy or over-complimentary.
- Why It’s Important: Playful teasing adds spice to the conversation, keeps her engaged, and builds a fun rapport. It makes the interaction feel less formal and more like an inside joke between the two of you.
- Example: “Are you always this much trouble, or is today special?”
3. Do Keep Texts Short and to the Point
In the early stages of dating, it’s important not to overwhelm her with long, drawn-out texts. Short, concise messages are more effective and keep the conversation moving without putting too much pressure on her to respond.
- Why It’s Important: Long texts can come across as needy or overly invested, which can diminish attraction. Short texts are easier to respond to and keep the conversation light and fast-paced.
- Example: “Just saw the funniest thing… remind me to tell you about it next time we meet.”
4. Do Keep Some Mystery
Keeping a bit of mystery in your texts helps build intrigue and leaves her wanting more. Don’t reveal everything about yourself or try to explain your entire life story in text form.
- Why It’s Important: Mystery creates a sense of excitement and anticipation, making her more curious about you. It also helps prevent over-communication, which can lead to text fatigue.
- Example: “You’ll never guess what happened today. I’ll tell you in person, it’s too good to text.”
5. Do Initiate Plans to Meet in Person
The authors emphasize that texting should be a tool to eventually set up in-person meetings. It’s important to keep the focus on moving from texting to real-life interactions rather than getting stuck in a never-ending text conversation.
- Why It’s Important: In-person interactions are where real attraction is built. Texting should serve as a bridge to set up dates or meetings, rather than the primary form of communication.
- Example: “This conversation is too fun for text. Let’s continue it over coffee this weekend.”
Texting Don’ts
1. Don’t Over-Text or Send Multiple Texts in a Row
One of the biggest mistakes you can make in the early stages of dating is over-texting. Sending too many texts, especially without getting a reply, can come across as needy or desperate. It’s important to maintain balance and give her space to respond.
- Why It’s Important: Over-texting signals insecurity and neediness, which can kill attraction. It’s better to wait for her to respond rather than sending multiple texts to fill the silence.
- Example: Avoid sending, “Hey, are you there?” followed by “Why aren’t you responding?” Instead, wait patiently for her to reply.
2. Don’t Use Texts for Serious Conversations
Serious conversations about relationships, feelings, or conflicts should not be handled over text, especially in the early stages of dating. Text messages are easily misinterpreted, and serious topics can come across as heavy or overwhelming.
- Why It’s Important: Serious conversations via text can be misread and often create tension. Save these discussions for in-person meetings where tone and body language can help convey your message more clearly.
- Example: Avoid texting, “We need to talk about where this is going.” Instead, keep things light and save serious discussions for later stages.
3. Don’t Respond Immediately Every Time
Responding instantly to every text can give the impression that you’re too available or too eager. It’s important to pace your responses and maintain a sense of your own independence and busy lifestyle.
- Why It’s Important: Instant responses can signal a lack of independence and may lead to her taking your attention for granted. Slowing down your replies shows that you have other things going on, which can increase her interest.
- Example: If she texts, don’t always reply within seconds. Take a few minutes or even hours (depending on the context) before responding with a fun, thoughtful message.
4. Don’t Bombard Her with Questions
While it’s natural to ask questions to get to know her better, avoid turning the conversation into an interview. Rapid-fire questions can make the conversation feel forced or overly formal.
- Why It’s Important: Bombarding her with questions can make the conversation feel like a job interview, which kills attraction. It’s better to sprinkle questions in between light, fun exchanges to keep the flow natural.
- Example: Instead of asking, “What do you do for work? What are your hobbies? Where did you grow up?” space out questions with playful comments or jokes in between.
5. Don’t Seek Constant Validation or Reassurance
In the early stages of dating, it’s crucial to avoid seeking constant validation from her through texts. This means not fishing for compliments or asking questions like, “Are you still interested?” or “Did I say something wrong?”
- Why It’s Important: Seeking validation can come across as insecure, which is unattractive. Confidence is key, and you should assume she’s interested unless her behavior suggests otherwise.
- Example: Avoid texting, “Are you still into this?” or “Did I say something wrong?” Instead, stay confident and keep the conversation flowing.
Conclusion
In “Magnetic Messaging,” Bobby Rio and Rob Judge emphasize that texting in the early stages of dating should be used to create attraction, maintain excitement, and set up in-person interactions. The Do’s focus on keeping texts light, fun, playful, and concise, while moving the conversation toward real-life meetings. The Don’ts warn against over-texting, getting too serious, or seeking validation through text. By following these guidelines, you can create an engaging, flirty dynamic that builds anticipation and keeps the connection strong without overcomplicating the communication.