How does “The Tao of Badass” suggest men keep the romance alive in a long-term relationship?
In The Tao of Badass, Joshua Pellicer offers several strategies for keeping the romance alive in a long-term relationship. The book emphasizes maintaining excitement, connection, and attraction over time, even as the relationship deepens. Here are some of the key suggestions Pellicer offers for keeping the romance strong:
1. Maintain Spontaneity
- What it involves: Pellicer advises keeping the relationship fresh by introducing spontaneous gestures, surprises, or activities. This could involve unplanned dates, thoughtful gifts, or even spontaneous compliments.
- Why it helps: Spontaneity prevents the relationship from falling into a predictable routine, which can dull the excitement and romantic feelings. By keeping things unexpected, you reignite the passion and surprise that were present early on.
2. Continue Flirting
- What it involves: Flirting should not end once the relationship becomes serious. Pellicer encourages maintaining playful teasing, humor, and affectionate banter to keep the spark alive.
- Why it helps: Flirting creates an emotional and physical connection that keeps both partners feeling desired and engaged. It maintains the sense of attraction and excitement that often fades with time.
3. Invest in Quality Time Together
- What it involves: Spending intentional, undistracted time together is crucial for keeping romance alive. Pellicer suggests planning date nights, shared hobbies, or simply setting aside time to connect emotionally.
- Why it helps: Quality time strengthens emotional intimacy, which fuels romance. When you actively invest in each other, it deepens your bond and keeps the relationship feeling special.
4. Keep Personal Growth Ongoing
- What it involves: Pellicer emphasizes the importance of personal growth for both partners. Continually working on self-improvement, learning new skills, and evolving as individuals brings new energy to the relationship.
- Why it helps: When both partners are growing, it creates new dimensions in the relationship and prevents stagnation. Being with someone who is dynamic and evolving keeps the relationship exciting and inspiring.
5. Physical Touch and Affection
- What it involves: Regular physical touch, whether through casual affection like holding hands or more intimate gestures, is key to maintaining a romantic connection. Pellicer encourages men to keep being affectionate, even in small ways.
- Why it helps: Physical touch reinforces emotional closeness and keeps the romantic connection strong. It helps both partners feel loved and desired, maintaining a sense of intimacy.
6. Create Shared Experiences
- What it involves: Experiencing new things together helps strengthen the bond and creates memories that bring you closer. Pellicer suggests traveling, trying new activities, or setting goals as a couple.
- Why it helps: Shared experiences keep the relationship dynamic and prevent it from becoming routine. These experiences help you grow together and create stories and moments that enrich the relationship.
7. Maintain Independence
- What it involves: Pellicer advises maintaining a balance between spending time together and keeping some independence. Pursuing your own interests and giving your partner space ensures that both individuals continue to feel fulfilled personally.
- Why it helps: Independence helps maintain a sense of mystery and prevents partners from becoming overly dependent on each other. This balance keeps attraction strong by allowing each person to bring something fresh and unique to the relationship.
8. Continue to Communicate Desires and Needs
- What it involves: Pellicer suggests regularly communicating your desires, romantic or otherwise, to keep the relationship fulfilling for both partners. Being open about what you need or what you enjoy romantically helps ensure that both partners stay engaged.
- Why it helps: Open communication prevents resentment or dissatisfaction from building up. When both partners feel heard and valued, it keeps the emotional and romantic connection strong.
9. Plan Romantic Gestures
- What it involves: Planning romantic gestures, such as a surprise date or writing a heartfelt note, is recommended to keep the relationship feeling special. These acts don’t need to be extravagant but should show thoughtfulness and effort.
- Why it helps: Romantic gestures remind your partner that you value them and are willing to put in effort to make them feel loved. Small but meaningful gestures help keep the romance alive by showing ongoing affection and care.
10. Keep the Element of Mystery
- What it involves: Even in long-term relationships, it’s important to maintain some sense of mystery. This could mean keeping personal goals or aspirations that you gradually share with your partner, or simply being less predictable in how you express affection.
- Why it helps: Mystery helps sustain intrigue and attraction. It encourages curiosity and keeps both partners engaged as they continue to learn new things about each other over time.
Conclusion
In The Tao of Badass, Pellicer stresses that keeping romance alive in a long-term relationship involves maintaining playfulness, investing in quality time, and continually growing both individually and as a couple. Through spontaneity, physical affection, and regular communication of needs, partners can sustain the passion and connection that make a relationship fulfilling over the long term.